Saturday, August 1, 2009

Keeping a Promise

After the event last night. I figured that my parents drove back to post and managed to either reach my aunt and uncle or email them the news. Because this morning, I woke to an email from my Aunt saying she have internet over in Iraq and that she hopes I can update her every single day on how Sean is doing. (And of course will try to reach my uncle at the same time, who have limited internet and calls in Afghanistan.) She thanked me for writing my blog so she can see how I feel. She thanked me for taking care of Sean while she can and ended the email with an inside joke.

I wrote back and said I would do my best. And hope that both her and my uncle would try not to worry. But think about it...no matter where you are in the world, no matter if you're deployed or not, you will still miss your little boy and worry if he's feeling okay, if he's eating, and more.

So in trying to keep up with this "promise" I made to my aunt. I will try to update this blog every day. (I am currently trying to make a new section for Sean so people can go there to read the posts. But looks like Wordpress doesn't allow different posts at each section. So it will be harder for people to keep track of the date and so forth. For now, I will just continue to write under this blog and hope I can come up with something soon.)

Last night was fairly decent, my parents, Sean, and I saw X-Men Evolution with Sean (his top choice!) and before long, he was worn out. I had the chance to go out for a run earlier this morning and grab a bite to eat before Sean woke up. It might be the feeling and worry of surgery but Sean have been pretty clingy all day. Majority of the day was laying next to me and watch me work on my laptop. He didn't feel like doing math like he usually do and he didn't feel like playing Wii. (Of which I wonder if there was something I am doing wrong?)

Looking at him I could tell he missed his parents. After gathering up papers and pencils, I managed to get Sean to draw out cards and helped him write a few words that are going to be send to his parents. We even got on the computer and custom made a couple cards that is already send to both my Uncle and Aunt.

Even with the excitement of writing to his parents, I could tell he was not feeling good. And before I sealed the drawings in an envelope, Sean asked me.

"Cousin Matty, if I die who will take care of Mommy and Daddy?"

Breaks my heart to think that a 5 year old, whose life is only supposed to start is already asking about death. I did my best and reassured him not to worry about that right now because right now, making cards for his Mom and Dad was more important.

By the way he whispered "Ok" I could tell he didn't believe me. I could tell he wanted to ask more questions but instead, picked up the paper and wrote "I love you" for his Mom.

Sean's a fighter, a joker, and a brave kid. And truly, every minute, every second of my day have been hoping and praying that he will continue to fight. And in the future, share his experience with others, make jokes and laugh about something that once threaten his life. If anyone can laugh at cancer, I believe Sean can.

And before I end this note, something quite small yet funny from our own little hero.

Sean: "What's that?"
Me: "I'm writing see? About you, see your name there?"
Sean: "Me? REALLY? I'M A STAR!"

lol funny kid :P

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